I would rather suck my big toe than have to go to the dentist.
There, I've said it !
The bottom teeth are now hopefully okay.
They were nearly done in after I chewed on a Viactive Calcium chew
and pulled off an old cap, only to discover that the tooth next to that one was equally, if not in worse shape, than the Viactive one. Today...a double crown was inserted and a whole new way to floss - with some incredible gum torturing contraption that looks like I'm threading a needle - and I'm blind !
The TOP teeth are in worse shape. After 6 gorgeous crowns last year 3 had to be replaced because of resorption in the middle one.....Lets not get into that you dental students out there.....its a long story.
More Novocaine than a human is allowed by law. Stinging. Painful. Crybaby! Underneath the caps I resembled a vampire. It was even too gross for ME to take a pix of.
There'll be one more loooong visit for the vampire teeth and hopefully I'm done..... till it's time for the 6 mos cleaning when the agony of defeat starts all over again.
Okay..so, then the dentist (who I really do love BTW) says I'm ok to eat but should wait for the novocaine to wear off. Since I couldn't make my lips look in the least normal anyway I figured that was a good idea. I'd go across the street to Ocean County Mall, walk around for an hour...call it exercise....try on a few things....call it exercise.... and by then it will be time for sushi.
I park.....at BOSCOVS dept store. I see the sign when I come inside the store says 'SOUTH' entrance so I know I have to remember this if I ever want to see my car again.
Into the mall we go...straight through Boscovs, do not pass go, and on to Macys....don't NEED anything...am just going there for the exercise & to kill time.
First thing I pass in the mall is a huge cart selling gummies. Are they kidding me? I just had 3 hours of dental work done.....
Aaaah Macys......find some GLEE apparel in the teenage section. I am a grandma who THINKS she is a teen...so...I try some on. I am killing time. WOW one shirt fits great...it says MUSIC IS MY LIFE
I buy it.
There's a strong possibility I'm gonna look like a dork cause it says GLEE on it, but I don't care..I really love the shirt. I really love GLEE.
I schlep around for another hour...I find a purse..I need a purse like I need a third eye.....I buy 3 bras....those I need......I kill time as the mouth thing improves and now...alas..I am ready to go. Must find "SOUTH".I am moderately confused. I don't see any signs over the doors. I whip out my IPhone and search for SOUTH on the compass. Brilliant huh???? I walk right toward SOUTH. I'm so excited that the IPhone compass is so accurate.
No sign over that door.....or any door.
Aaaah, but, no panic.
Oh no...its too soon to panic. It's probably early dementia . I can deal. Worst case scenario..... I'll call The Lenster who'll leave me there 'exercising' till about 6 pm when he'll drive over after work to help me find the car. By then my credit card will be maxed anyway and I'll probably be a size smaller from all that walking.
I decide to walk outside Macys.....in the parking lot..... yucky, humid, drizzling. I walk around the entire building. Macys is big. No car.
After 30 minutes of this utter nonsense....since I know I came there by car...I decide to go back inside the mall and retrace my path...I'm lucky I can remember that I had a 'path' to begin with !
Now I am going to use my IPhone to leave myself photos of where I parked and voice memos too....cause I see where all of this is going !
I called The Lenster to re-cap the story....YUP, he says..no matter how many crossword puzzles and word games we do.....this is where we're all headed !!!
Oy vey !!!